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Nobodies Opinion Jan 2013

Kneecap

By Billy “Kneecap” Braddock


If you are reading this you have survived the Mayan apocalypse. Maybe after reading this, you may have wished you didn’t. The end of the world was supposed to happen on December 21, 2012. However, it did not end. Maybe it was just simply that the calendar rolled over into the next b’ak’tun (20 k’atun/144,000 days/394.3 solar years).

It’s pretty similar to the Georgian date of January 1, 2000 the beginning of a new millennium. Boy, those last lines sure make me sound intelligent. Like WC Fields once said “If you can’t razzle them with dazzle, baffle them with bullshit”. I’m pretty good at that.

Another thought that was brought up was that the Mayans didn’t include leap years. There have been 514 leap years since Julius Caesar created it in 45 BC. However, the Mayan “tun” (year) is only 360 days long. Not 365 like our current Calendar. So with recalculating, the apocalypse should’ve occurred nine months ago. So unless Snooki’s baby turns out to be the anti-Christ, congratulations for surviving and enjoy 2013.

I almost didn’t even make it to December. In November, on my birthday I was at Roscoe’s Chili Challenge in Lakeland. Now, I’m not much of a camper. My idea of roughing it is going to a Holiday Inn that doesn’t have a bellhop, so camping is quite a challenge for me. Luckily for me, friends of mine T-shirts Plus vendors (Gwen & Pete Hockford) were going to set up at Roscoe’s. They carried my gear, so my bike didn’t look like The Beverly Hillbillies heading to California.

When I got there a new challenge confronted me. I had to set up the tent. Lucky for me bikers tend to assist each other when they see a dummy trying to do something. The first guy who came to my rescue was a biker lawyer from Tampa, Brad Souders. Now, we had two dummies trying to screw a football. Thank God, the campers next to me were experienced so they jumped in and had the tent up in 10 mins.

Even though I was there to cover the event for the magazine, I still indulged in the fun. The nights were cold, but the days were awesome. Everyone was in a partying mood. Plenty of entertainment and the body painting was exceptional. With everything that goes on it was hard to remember why I was there. This is one of the best adult biker parties I know of. Oh, by the way the chili was excellent.

Now, let’s get down to an even more important subject. Recently, the word is “We need to get rid of the Second Amendment.” The word is if you didn’t have a gun, you wouldn’t have murdered. Now, I heard this and I thought to myself does a 6’2/228 pound man really need a gun to kill somebody? And a few crazies with box cutters were able to kill more people in a single day than anyone with a machine gun, remember 9/11?

Even our attorney general stated, “We have no right to possess guns.” Now that’s scary! The person who’s supposed to be defending the law of the Constitution is totally blind to its words. The anti-gun industry comes up with more false facts to promote their cause. However, if you do a little research the truth will come out.

Even in the FBI crime stats it is reported that you are more likely to be killed by hands or feet, than by a shotgun or rifle. Does that mean that gloves and shoes need regulation because they’re concealing a weapon?

It’s hard to lie to the public anymore with all the available information at your fingertips. The one good thing I’ve been hearing lately is that the sale of handguns and requests for concealed weapon permits are at an all time high. Maybe the criminals will stop and think it’s time to get a job instead of trying to rob somebody because he/she may have a weapon.

Some words of wisdom: many things can be preserved in alcohol/self-respect isn’t one of them.
When you get old, would you rather have Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s? Parkinson’s, of course. Better to spill an ounce of scotch, then to forget where you put the bottle.
See you on the shiny side of tomorrow…

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