By Billy “Kneecap” Braddock

Ever since I heard that Russia has banned Americans from adopting their orphans I’ve been puzzled. Why do we need to adopt children from other countries? Don’t we have enough orphans in this country? I don’t have any children of my own, but if I wanted a child I think I would have a large selection in this country to pick from. Whenever this government wants to pass a certain bill it will always say “it’s for the children”. Malarkey! “As long as the government is perceived as working for the benefit of the children, the people will happily, endure almost any curtailment of liberty in almost any deprivation.”(Adolf Hitler).

Another thing that gets my thong in a wad is slogans. Slogans must be working because Congress has less than 10% approval of voters, but voters put 90% back in office. Duh! Most of the government slogans are derived to cover the true meaning. “Their fair share” means tax the rich. “Investments” means spending. “Reducing Gun Violence” means gun control. “Undocumented” means illegal, etc. etc. etc… “The receptivity of the masses is very limited, their intelligence small, but their power of forgetting is enormous. In consequence of these facts, all effective propaganda must be limited to a very few points and we must harp on these in slogans until the last member of the public understands what you want him to understand by your slogan.” (Adolf Hitler). As you see, I’ve never have been and never will be “Politically Correct”. P.C. means having to say you’re sorry, when you know you’re not.

This Bike Week, even with the bad economy, we should be expecting 500,000 bikers in Daytona. Bikers will stop eating for a month (I said eating not drinking) in order to save enough money to come to Bike Week. There will be a lot of new people that are unfamiliar with our roads and the driving practices of the cages.

Here are a couple of hints to help you avoid eating asphalt.

#1 Assume drivers can’t see you; ride assuming that you and your motorcycle are totally invisible to motorists.

#2 Maintain safe spacing; be an island.

#3 Anticipate trouble; be ready to avoid a bad traffic situation.

#4 Beware of oncoming left turners: motorist turning left in front of you at intersections. This is the leading cause of death to motorcycle riders.

#5 Know your own personal limits.

#6 Don’t give into road rage.

#7 Don’t allow tailgating.

#8 Don’t be blinded by sun and glare. You might just find yourself being blinded by the light, and remember if the sun is at your back, oncoming traffic may not be able to see you.

#9 You might want to consider wearing protective clothing and a skid lid or a brain bucket.

#10 Pay attention to idiots talking on cell phones or texting. I saw a great sign on a church sign “Honk if you love Jesus, text while driving if you want to meet him”. The best way to be safe is to learn the basic ways to control your motorcycle and to learn how to recognize traffic situations that you need to be ready to handle. Pay attention to the alcohol content, not in your gas tank, but in your belly. “Crashing SUCKS”. However, it might be a good idea to have the proper insurance. Allstate is a good pick. God forbid something should happen, it’s always good to have a good attorney like Rue, Ziffra & Caldwell. Be safe and enjoy the week, so you can come back for Biketoberfest.

My ex-wives always thought I was hard of hearing but actually I was just hard of listening.

The other day somebody called my Beagle a mutt. I explained that he was a full-blooded mongrel.

See you on the shiny side of tomorrow…