By Billy “Kneecap” Braddock

Every day is a learning day for me. And last month I really got taught a lesson. Years ago, I was told don’t sign your credit card. The reason being, anyone who takes your card has a sample of your signature, which they can not only use on any charge slip, but on your checks as well. So, I always would write “ask for picture ID” in the white strip.

This has always worked for me, until you guessed it; I was confronted by a government employee at the U.S. Postal Service. It still fascinates me that a simple signed credit card would be accepted, and a credit card with a picture ID would be denied. After this confrontation. I went home and did some research. I found out that, in reality, the issue of whether the card is signed is often irrelevant.

How many times has a retail store employee even look at your signature? Hell, most can’t even read. And in places like gas stations where customers often swipe their own cards, they never even interact with an employee. Even Visa and MasterCard have relaxed the rules about requiring signatures on receipts for minor purchases, meaning the person using the card might not need to sign anything at all. So I still prefer to write “check ID” instead of the signature, because I want to avoid the problem of going through a disputed purchase. You can take this advice or leave it. It’s up to you.

Everybody knows I’m a crotchety old man. Some things piss me off more than others. One is bicyclists. I wouldn’t have a problem with them if they would just follow the rules of the road. DOT spends a lot of money to provide a safe environment for these people. However, they don’t use the bike paths or follow the rules of the road. I love to see the sign “share the road”. I don’t mind sharing the road, as long as they do. They don’t pay any road taxes but they insist on preferential treatment. I never see a policeman give a ticket to a bicyclist for rolling through a stop sign or a stoplight. You try it.

Another thing that irks my soul is when somebody invents something very important and useful, and some people refuse to use it. Example: “turn signals”. Another thing that not only upsets me, but actually scares me is drivers texting or using a cell phone while driving. You know they’re not concentrating on their driving. I’ve even seen a guy on a motorcycle talking on one, without a blue tooth. And another of course, the people who drive in the left hand lane on a four-lane road. I have a fear of passing on the right, because you know the minute you try, they will move over to the right. That’s enough for this article; I’ll get to more down the road.

Question of the month: Why the hell is Congress involved in baseball? With all the economic issues, war issues, and the corruption in the government itself, why has Congress felt this great need to pursue baseball? I suppose it’s no wonder we’re in the economic and employment mess we are in. Priorities for Congress are very strange. Hell, they don’t even hide the fact that they’re not interested in this Country or the Constitution anymore. The government actually had a study to study studies. You think we’re in trouble? Congress’ oath of office should include “to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God”.

I love doing research, especially when I come up with something that makes me smile. I found out that drinking alcohol may enhance a person’s problem solving skills. Scientists found out that participants with a BAC of 0.07 or higher solved 40% more problems than their counterparts, and took 12 seconds to complete the task compared to 15.5 seconds by their teetotaler participants. Now, you know why I’m so smart, I always keep my BAC above 0.07. No wonder I’m smiling.

Now that I am 39+ shipping and handling. I realize I am the oldest I’ve been. So far. My brain is like a combination of a lazy Susan and a colander/ spins slow and leaks. My mind works a lot like lightning. One brilliant flash and it’s all gone, but my butt provides the thunder.

One short word from the Beagle. The other day while I was walking him. I asked him “How come owners of cats don’t put them on a leash?” He answered “Maybe they want them to run away”.
Remember, be who you are and say what you feel, because those that matter, don’t mind, and those that mind don’t matter.

See you on the shiny side of tomorrow.